I haven't written anything in this blog
for so darn long, and I honestly miss it. There's a different sense
of freedom, of liberation, that comes with being able to speak your
mind the way you want to (sans grammar Nazis or professors who
require you to write argumentatively or with an expository purpose,
etc etc). I've missed writing for the sake of expressing, of sharing,
of just putting a piece of me out there for no one in particular
(maybe just myself, actually) to read.
It's taken me the longest time to do
this again, although I don't know why because this is honestly
therapeutic if you don't think about the fact that this kind of also
counts as talking to yourself or to thin air (aka kinda cray cray).
Not that my life hasn't been as eventful as during the summer or the
first few months of college, but quite the contrary, and I think
school has kept me busy long enough to lose touch with my
eagerly-writing-for-leisure self.
In fact, perhaps the only reason I'm
actually writing something here now is because I ought to be writing
something completely different for English 'Advanced Expository
Writing' class. Thing is, I just don't know what to write and argue
for in my essay about the “lack of genuine political involvement in
Ateneo.” I can't seem to organize my thoughts in such a way that
would succinctly describe what I think and how I feel about the
school's political organization. (I mean, I want to convey that the
blame shouldn't solely be put on the student government's structure
or officials, but on the general student population as well, for
devolving into constituents who are or who pretend to be so damn
indifferent even though they always have something to say about
global and local politics or the way things are run in school. It's
like they're involved and aware, but not really, because they don't
act upon it.) It's so frustrating, I don't how to word this essay
properly! And it doesn't help that my writing buddy slash peer
reviewer is absolutely amazing and is so good at writing, he makes me
feel so unsure of my work every time I have to submit a copy to him
for comments and approval (often even more so than when I only have
to give it to my professor). I mean, for crying out loud, he can make
a solid, cold, heart-shaped piece of gray boring rock sound so
profound and significant, so next to him I have zero writing
potential, or for the sake of my pride and dignity, I give myself
0.00074804 writing prowess points.
Enough babble, I should get my head
back into serious writing. It's barely two months until it's summer
again, so 'til then, I'll have to bury my nose in my books, finish
writing these somewhat uninspired essays, keep myself out of trouble,
and pull myself through my first year of college. No biggie. ;)
