idk. where have my creative juices gone??

I haven't written anything in this blog for so darn long, and I honestly miss it. There's a different sense of freedom, of liberation, that comes with being able to speak your mind the way you want to (sans grammar Nazis or professors who require you to write argumentatively or with an expository purpose, etc etc). I've missed writing for the sake of expressing, of sharing, of just putting a piece of me out there for no one in particular (maybe just myself, actually) to read.

It's taken me the longest time to do this again, although I don't know why because this is honestly therapeutic if you don't think about the fact that this kind of also counts as talking to yourself or to thin air (aka kinda cray cray). Not that my life hasn't been as eventful as during the summer or the first few months of college, but quite the contrary, and I think school has kept me busy long enough to lose touch with my eagerly-writing-for-leisure self.

In fact, perhaps the only reason I'm actually writing something here now is because I ought to be writing something completely different for English 'Advanced Expository Writing' class. Thing is, I just don't know what to write and argue for in my essay about the “lack of genuine political involvement in Ateneo.” I can't seem to organize my thoughts in such a way that would succinctly describe what I think and how I feel about the school's political organization. (I mean, I want to convey that the blame shouldn't solely be put on the student government's structure or officials, but on the general student population as well, for devolving into constituents who are or who pretend to be so damn indifferent even though they always have something to say about global and local politics or the way things are run in school. It's like they're involved and aware, but not really, because they don't act upon it.) It's so frustrating, I don't how to word this essay properly! And it doesn't help that my writing buddy slash peer reviewer is absolutely amazing and is so good at writing, he makes me feel so unsure of my work every time I have to submit a copy to him for comments and approval (often even more so than when I only have to give it to my professor). I mean, for crying out loud, he can make a solid, cold, heart-shaped piece of gray boring rock sound so profound and significant, so next to him I have zero writing potential, or for the sake of my pride and dignity, I give myself 0.00074804 writing prowess points.

Enough babble, I should get my head back into serious writing. It's barely two months until it's summer again, so 'til then, I'll have to bury my nose in my books, finish writing these somewhat uninspired essays, keep myself out of trouble, and pull myself through my first year of college. No biggie. ;)

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